The Gringo Olympics: Bicentennial Edition

After this long weekend, the whole nation of Chile breathes a small sigh of relief, mixed with satisfaction and mild gastro-intestinal distress.

The bicentenario has come to a close, after four straight days of partying.
This also means the end of the Gringo Olympics: Bicentennial Edition.

Check it, the events:

First, test your navigation/deep-breathing skills in a crowd of 60,ooo at La Moneda.

Dance the cueca, Chile's national dance (a.k.a., trip over your own feet while waving a white handkercheif over your head - how ironic, that an integral part of the dance looks very much like waving the flag of surrender...)

Distend your stomach after eating an empanada as big as your head.

Walk a straight line after a few glasses of chicha, a potent grape-cider.

Cram yourself into a metro car approximately twenty people over capacity in order to get to the next party.

Strain your brain while learning to play a complicated card game in Spanish at a get-together.

Fine-tune your hearing aid while listening to a ninety-year-old tell her life story in a muddled, circuitous language, unintelligible to both natives and foreigners.

Dodge low-flying (possibly malevolently-flying) kites in the field of Parque O'Higgins.

Avoid grease popping from chicken being fried in a shopping cart on the street.

And finally, return to school, well-exhausted, well-satiated, and well... not quite ready for a midterm.

I think I deserve a medal of some sort.